I have followed the Mayan End of Days thing with a certain degree of fascinated amusement until last year when (and I kid you not) we picked up not one but TWO collections because the owners believed that the end was near. Guess they figured the sand really was running out of the hourglass, so they might as well liquidate the collection and use it all for hookers and blow. Or whatever they did. Cuique suum, my friends.
Recently, however, a few things have happened that just make me stop to wonder if the doomsday crowd just might actually be on to something:
* Nov. 6, 2012: W h a t ?? Oh holy crap. Enough said.
* Nov. 17, 2012: The Hostess Twinkie - a very tasty, classic treat - sometimes billed as the only food certain to survive a nuclear holocaust... GONE. As soon as new spread that Hostess was Tango Uniform,
people were paying over $100 for unopened boxes of Twinkies on eBay. Hmm..
* Nov. 21, 2012: I was walking through a store south of Nashville, TN, when an amazingly attractive young woman looked my way and gave me the most pleasant, warm, friendly smile I have seen in years. Nobody behind me (I checked.) My clothes were completely fastened, being worn appropriately right-side-out, and I wasn't dragging a train of stowaway bog roll from my shoe. (check - check, all clear.) Anna immediately suggested that this vision of pure beauty
must have thought that I was someone else, or even more likely, she was just pausing to relieve a bit of gastric discomfort. Plausible, I guess, but I still think it might be a sign.
* Dec. 4, 2012: My very technophobic mother called to inform me that she just bought a computer. If you all knew this septuagenarian, you would have heard "Dun dun dunnnn...." in your head just like I did! I'm telling you, a chill passed over me and the hair on the back of my neck stood straight up. No doubt about it now - the END IS NEAR. Started off skeptical, but now I'm pretty well convinced.
* Dec. 11, 2012: Well, THIS just makes it official!
From today's Chicago Sun Times:
"SPRINGFIELD - In a huge win for gun-rights groups, a federal appeals court in Chicago Tuesday tossed the state's ban on carrying concealed weapons and gave Illinois' legislature 180 days to craft a law legalizing concealed carry." It would actually have surprised me far less to see
"SPRINGFIELD - Residents across the state are reporting that small monkeys have suddenly started flying out of their butts."
SO, what if the world IS ending in just a few short days? You're still a collector, right? Well, if the world is ending, frankly there isn't jack-all you can do about it. So rather than engage in needless worry, you can spend what little time you have left enjoying the hunt for militaria at end-of-the-world discount prices on the AGM website. Go ahead -
SHOP AS IF THERE IS NO TOMORROW. And what if December 22 dawns bright and sunny like nothing ever happened? Well, yes, we absolutely still expect you to pay the bill. The deals you got will still be great deals. It's a WIN-WIN of apocalyptic proportions.
Don't miss it.
You may NEVER get another chance to shop for militaria.
www.advanceguardmilitaria.com